6/22/12: Day 5–Madison Retreat

Some incredible surprises today–when I was reading a classmate’s comments on my work yesterday I saw a note offering to serve as a reader for the ms. Because I respect her comments and knowledge I decided to take her up on it since I regularly employ readers anyway. We ran into each other at b’fast and made the deal. So surprise #1.

Surprise #2 came in a kind of back-handed way: I find comfort in getting a tarot card reading from time to time and had added it to my list of what I wanted to accomplish with this week. So when I went to the shop where I had had a really great experience a year or so ago, I was disappointed to sit down with someone who not only didn’t read tarot but seemed to be intent on offering me advice rather than giving me insight into the psychic world around me. It was, of course, as much my fault as hers but I left there really upset and disappointed.  It was definitely out of proportion to the importance of this one thing. Anyway I returned to my room and the disappointment festered until I decided to look online and there was this woman–nearby who is an artist of some repute in the area and I just liked her photo and her blog and her work–so I called her and we have an appt. for Sat. morning–so perhaps it’s fitting that this will be the last thing I do before leaving and bringing this week to a close.

Surprise #3 came when I decided to take a walk along the lake path and find the spot where I wanted to scatter L’s ashes (not all of them–there are other special places he asked to reside in) and I came to this place that I thought might be the right spot and right behind me came this guy who climbed over a barrier to get closer to the lake for fishing. FISHING!! L loved it. Was he telling me something? I think maybe so. I talked to the guy some and he kind of indicated that a little further back the way I had come was an even better spot for fishing. I had looked at any number of places where people had made paths down to the shore but they had all seemed too steep and treacherous for me to  So I thought I had the spot but then I started back and sure enough not ten yards from there was a path that was neither steep nor treacherous — it was perfect. Tomorrow I will go back with ashes — I think early morning or perhaps sundown might be best.

Finally surprise #4 came when I returned once again to my room and found a lovely note from someone I have met this week reaching out to say Can we have coffee and stay in touch? Now THAT is L at work! Continuing to bring people into my life from all sorts of directions — people who will ease the way for me with their friendship. As I said to our minister when we were planning L’s memorial: this is not A love story; this is THE love story–one that continues to sustain and comfort me even as I struggle with every new day.  Til tomorrow….

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